Bumper Sticker Etiquette

Here at the K’s house, we have a few random decals and magnets on our cars. I’m pretty sure we have a GT alumni window decal that cannot be seen because of the tinting (why did the engineering school make these so that they only go on from the inside of the car?). We have a Kedron Elementary school magnet and depending on the season we usually have a basketball, baseball or football magnets as well.

The only car flair that has been an issue at our home has been the recent addition of a Mary Kay decal. I recently signed up to join the pink bubble of legal pyramiding. I really needed the discount and the extra cash from these products that “really do sell themselves.”

My husband took issue not with the pink bubble but with the car decal. He didn’t want to be seen driving a car with that sticker. He thought it would be a mark against his man card.

I tried to explain to him that just by driving the crossover-minivan/suv he already had a mark on his man card but he wouldn’t listen.

Then a few weeks later I met someone who asked if I sold Mary Kay. She had seen my sticker and needed to place an order.

He-who-shall-not-be-named-in-sermons has been quiet since them. I guess that the $6 I made off that transaction was the cost of him being okay with the window decal.

It is fun to make fun of other people’s bumpers. I’m really not one to talk but I feel that there are a few bottom lines that one should follow when advertising on your car:

1. Make sure that your car flair agrees with each other. The COEXIST bumper sticker is great but not when teamed up with “Jesus died for you. Allah wants you to die for him.” sticker.
2. If you want to brag about your child on the car, make sure you remove the stickers before they get their learners. By this time most of their brain cells are being used up on dating and school anxiety and they don’t exactly seem like an “Honor Student” when they are out driving.
3. Political bumper stickers do have an expiration date. If you have a Vote Dukakis, sticker still on your car, please update it ASAP.

Just as God doesn’t care as much about what you look like on the outside as he does what’s going on inside of you, most motorists don’t care what the outside of the car is displaying as much as if the driver is safe and will get out of his or her way.

If you have a snarky story about bumper stickers, I’d love to hear it.

Until Everyone Hears,